Two years ago my youngest sibling graduated from high school and went off to college, officially leaving my parents with an empty nest. But they weren't unprepared; they had already arranged to take on a foreign exchange student for a year. Well, maybe they were a little unprepared. After raising four rambunctious girls, when quiet, well-mannered Jalil arrived from Marrakech, Morocco, I don't think they fully realized all the challenges that lay ahead in connecting and communicating with him. He spoke English quite well, but, as with everything, was very shy about using it.
My parents were happy with their decision to have a foreign student, but initially they were at a loss of how to relate to him. They encouraged him to feel at home - from raiding the refrigerator to vegging on the couch in front of the tube. And that's where the connection finally happened. One evening Jalil was quietly watching TV when my parents got home from work. As another part of their plan to avoid the effects of empty-nest syndrome, my parents had recently purchased a massive High Definition TV with Satellite broadcasting (of course they do this after all their children move out), but they hadn't really bothered to use it much yet. There was Jalil watching a movie in Arabic when they didn't even know they got Arabic programming as part of the satellite TV package!
Immediately they could see that Jalil was getting something he had really missed, a connection to the world he had always lived in and known. So my parents plopped down in front of the TV with him and watched the rest of the movie. He described the plot to them in English in great detail, and my mother later wrote to tell me that was the most she had heard him speak all at once since he moved in!
From there the TV became a great mode of socializing in an easy, comfortable way. My dad finally had a "son" whom he could explain the nuances of American football to. They ended up religiously fixed to the NFL Sunday Ticket every week - I can just picture my father's euphoria at finally having at least one member of the household who took a real interest in the sport. At the same time, Jalil taught my parents the finer points of soccer (something my sisters and I had somehow failed to do even after years of playing the sport).
If my father was thrilled to have someone to share his NFL Sunday Ticket with, he was even more delighted to finally have a way to open up with Jalil and really experience a cultural exchange. My parents took advantage of their HDTV purchase and used it to build a bond with their adopted family member. When one of my sisters went home for a weekend visit, apparently she had to do battle with the formerly-timid Jalil over the TV remote (she was less impressed by the Arabic programming and wanted to watch Lost), and in the end my parents negotiated a compromise and they watched sports, the four of them sitting together in the living room, a real family.
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